To go forward, a few backwards steps needed

As I enter my second week of recovery from surgery I tend to ponder a bit.

It really is hard the whole surgery thing, it’s not a decision one enters into lightly.
Especially when you’ve been here several times before.

Really is an interesting situation when you make a decision that will impact your short term ability in so many ways. For me having foot surgery means some fairly brutal treatment to my body and heavy impact on what can be done day-to-day. Not to mention various activity restrictions placed on me.

I saw an ad on the back of a bus recently that said “getting you back up the stairs” and it caused me to ponder my current situation.

It’s very easy to get caught in a negative headspace, of what one can’t do or what limitations one has. Sure, you have to be reasonable about just how much you can do, but part of challenge is working out just how much you can do.

Knowing that I was able to walk into hospital was great, knowing full well that when being discharged that wouldn’t be an option.

Over the past few weeks, prior to surgery, I spent a lot of time getting out and about, having dinner while the sunset in the background, going to the footy. Lots of lovely normal things.

In the past week I’ve actually managed to get out far more than I would have expected. That said they have always been very quick and short trips near to home.

I’m finding that I have to keep my leg elevated a lot which helps ease the discomfort I’m in.

The start of rehab is still 3 weeks away and I’m just a little bit keen for that to come so I can literally get moving again. I know that it is going to be a very challenging time and won’t be easy but then again anything worth doing isn’t generally easy.

One of the hardest things is all of this is how weak and frail I feel. I know that my rehab will start of very simple and basic.

I already have some basic exercises for my toe to do and it seems really stupidly simple, yet right now they are actually very hard to do. It’s just where I’m at, it’s what’s needed, I still struggle with that.

That’s where the thought of to go forward a few steps back needed rings sadly true.

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